2/8/10Abba,
To “be still and know” seems not enough. Or too much. In the silence, I stifle a scream. In the stillness, my body rocks. Back and forth. An empty chair moved by the wind. In this world, we will have trouble. Be of good cheer? Yes, alright. The eternal truth that You, indeed, have overcome is the only promise that my heart hears, that my frame obeys.
But not for long. The sighs, the moans, my son’s name under my breath, and the agitated movement of his mother’s body begin again. Yet there will be a day when morning brings more than mourning and silence and stillness are no longer my enemies. Others confide it happens. It must.
My love to You this morning, Abba, for perhaps it is Your ruah that rocks me.
(photo by Linda Charlene)
ruah ~ Hebrew: wind, breath, Spirit
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I do not think Jesus expects you to be of good cheer now, when even he wept over Lazerius, and the Bible says there is a time to mourn. Yet, to know he has overcome the world, and their is hope in him.
ReplyDeletePraying he is your prince of PEACE today.
Melanie,
ReplyDeleteYour prayers are touching my heart. I love you friend!!
Dawn
What I am hearing is a grieving heart, the very heart and love that He has put there, for the son He gave you. You are expressing your heart, so He can heal it... we are experiencing His love in your words.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Sonja
Melanie, I cannot help but think about Jesus' mother Mary, standing beneath the cross at Golgatha...the pain , the agony of watching her son suffer and die. May the dear mother of Jesus wrap you in her mantle of motherly love. And I, will stand with you beneath your cross of misery holding on so very tightly with a heart full of love and compassion.
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, it is the Spirit of God who gently rocks you in the stillness of your heart. love, ginny
Peace that passes understanding- to you today, Melanie.
ReplyDeleteThanks for letting us peak into your prayer life. You are touching so many lives!
ReplyDeleteI'm sending you hugs and love today, sweet friend.
ReplyDeleteSusan
Blessings and prayers,
ReplyDeleteandrea
Sweet Friend,
ReplyDeleteI couldn't of said it any better than Sonja. Her words to you fit perfectly to my lips as I read them out loud to you as well from here.
Your prayer time with our Father is one of great beauty, one-on-one time with Him, yet reaching and touching so many minds and hearts out here in the same breath...
May He fill you up completely with His Word, promises, grace, peace and yes joy as you continue to live life through Him without your son here on earth outwardly as well as inwardly sharing and helping so many others as you write. I for one, am in awe of your shining spirit, your deepest of faith and belief despite the darkest of hours in the days without your beautiful son...You are His shining light to all of us amidst your pain and heartache.
I love you dear sister and I continue to pray for you, for peace and refreshment, for joy amidst your sorrow, for His all consuming love and tenderness to envelop the very essence of who you are and where you are amidst the continued tugging and pulling upon your heart while grieving the loss of your boy's presence.
My prayers continue each and every day for you and your family.
Big Hugs,
Alleluiabelle
Melanie,
ReplyDeleteWhat a cute site! I found your blog through our mutual friend at Smelling Coffee. I love all of photos and different designs.
I'm new to this blogging world, and I would appreciate any suggestions you might have.
Thanks for what you do!
Blessings,
Melanie
Thoughts of you are always with me. I say your name to Him, praying He lifts the ache, even if, for a moment.
ReplyDeletelove,
Brandi
I think of you everyday Melanie...every day.
ReplyDeleteGod will bring the days without the pain someday...He has to, because He loves us and it wouldn't be a loving God not to bring peace in our heart...you need time....
Praying for His comfort and peace, sweet Melanie ~ I'm sure it is a time of mourning for you.
ReplyDeleteEvery day my heart goes out to you..sharing your pain. I pray for your everyday...but I do understand where you are right now..the pain of loss, the grief that seems unbearable. Without God, it would be impossible and with Him it is still unbearable. I lost my husband in a car accident after four years of marriage (he was my world) and although nothing like losing a son..the pain of that loss is the same. You can not get it back and you feel incomplete. Each day feels like its too hard...sometimes even breathing requires too much. But God can carry you thru this....and there will come a time that it is more bearable...but prayer is needed and your faith in your Father will help you. THere are so many praying for you Melanie...and even as you walk thru this difficult time...you are touching so many hearts. Hearts like mine who learned to love Andrew thru your posts even though we never met him. You are in our prayers!
ReplyDeleteI have just read through your last few posts and listened to you and your daughter's beautiful song. As I read your words, I think I can feel your pain, but I know that nobody can really feel the pain you are experiencing. With tears in my eyes, I say bless you and yours. laurie
ReplyDeleteAnd may Abba--- 'stay by your cradle til moring is nigh'... and
ReplyDeleterock you to sleep if necessary!
{{Hugs}} and prayers,
Stephanie
JESUS ONLY in 2010
I have been praying for you. Praying that God will rock you to sleep when sleep is nowhere near.
ReplyDeleteMelanie: I read your prayers and they hurt, it is like I am there with you. Still praying for you. Hugs, Martha
ReplyDeleteSweet Melanie,
ReplyDeleteYou are being lifted up, my friend. Paul has done many funerals, only once has he done a funeral for a child. I remember him having the hardest time knowing what to say. With adults, there is the usual (but genuine) sentiments..."their legacy is powerful, they lived a great life". But the questions and confusion of a child...are hard to answer to a grieving family. One thing I know for sure, no matter how long you are on this earth, you make an impact. Andrew made an impact. He touched the hearts of 2 little boys in northwest Atlanta that prayed for him and looked at his pictures, (and wanted his haircut!:) Wesley especially admired the picture of his scrapes from skateboarding. He thought that was waaaaay cool. Andrew has never met my boys, but he WILL meet them one day. I wonder, will there be skateboarding in heaven?
Yes - let His ruah rock you until you can sleep at peace in His arms...
ReplyDeleteLove to you~
Jennifer
My love to You this morning, Abba, for perhaps it is Your ruah that rocks me.
ReplyDeleteamen amen amen
Tears welled up. The Lord lead me to this post this morning to join you in prayer, to 'rock' with you.
My body was doing a lot of rocking last week, and the end your prayer just really ministered to me sweet sister...
I will look at these times I 'rock' differently now, instead of trying to 'contain' myself, allowing our Precious Father to 'rock' me...SIGH..
Love you sweet sister.