I'm blogging at www.melaniedorsey.com . Please join me there.

Oct 7, 2009

A letter to Andrew

Dear Andrew,
On a pillow on the floor I lay face down this morning. I cried out to God to bring relief to you. I asked our Father for words to pray. Groaning in the Spirit I know He heard me. I reminded Him that we ARE walking by faith and not by sight. I asked, "What else can we do?" "How else should we pray?"

And it was then my ancient friend Rizpah, again, came to mind. Rizpah, who beat off the birds by day and the beasts by night. So I forcefully commanded the "birds" and the "beasts" to leave your bedside in the Name of Jesus, that matchless Name, under which every other thing that has a name has to bow.

I reminded our Father and I reminded myself that you are in covenant relationship with Almighty God. I told infection, nauseau, headache, pressure behind your eyes, the spirit of depression and all traces of cancer that their "game" is over. I told all of these unholy things to go to hell where they belong.

If an evil person entered our home, it would be unwelcome and I would scream and pick up the nearest object as a weapon. I would beat if off and away from you, your sister and brother. I would fight, scream, kick and bite the intruder. I would protect you with my own body and I would cry out to God to intervene.

Son, cancer is unwelcome. It is not our friend and it is evil. Cancer is cells gone ballistic. Even the oncologist agreed that cancer can be considered an intruder.

So there is no confusion, son, let me remind you that God is not the author of sin, sickness or disease. He is the healer. Remember the story of Joseph? I reminded you that Joseph's brothers had an evil plot to take his life. But God had a different plan for Joseph. God turned the tables on the evil plan and brought Joseph through every hard place and in the end, Joseph was a shining example of the intentions of God for each of his children. Joseph was a dreamer and God had a plan for the dreamer. And God has a plan for you, dear son.

Often over the past few years, I have heard you talking quietly and when I ask about it, you tell me that you are talking to yourself and that you do that a lot.
So don't stop talking to yourself. Remind yourself of God's goodness. Tell yourself that God IS your healer and that His plans for you are for hope and a future. Stir up the gift of God within you, evangelist. And then talk to others about loving, praising and living for God.

Son, you have much fruit yet to bear and I trust God to fulfill His plans in your life. You must trust Him, too.

Finally, sweet son, if you see my lips moving but don't hear words, you will know I am reminding myself that we WILL see the goodness of God in the land of the LIVING.

Rest well. You had a rough night and I will fight for you while you sleep.
I love you more than you could ever know.
Love,
Mom

Specific ways to pray today:
Pray for a stop to nausea and vomiting. This started again last night even though he is on zofran around the clock.
Pray for a stop to headaches and pressure behind the eyes.
Pray that the excess fluid in his brain begins to be absorbed into his body.
Pray that Andrew has real joy and happiness today. He is lonely for home.
Pray for no more roommates. This makes everything so much worse!!!
Pray that my husband, Dan, and I stay strong and encouraged so we can help one another and also keep Andrew in good spirits.

I have been so touched by your comments and emails. You really have no idea how much I rely on you. The days drag and the nights are noisy. But God is here. And so often you are His "hands" extended this way.
Love,
Melanie

63 comments:

  1. I recently found your blog through a friend of mine. I went back and read your older posts to "catch up" on what has been happening. I pray for Andrew, your family and the doctors. God can and WILL perform miracles. Stay strong.

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  2. Powerful words from you, Melanie. Andrew is blessed to have a mom like you.

    Still praying.

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  3. Angela and I lifted Andrew up this morning in prayer, as we do each and every morning of the week. I will make sure we take this specific prayers to the Lord on your behalf today. Sending you my love and (((hugs))) in Christ.

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  4. Melanie, tears are streaming down my face at the words you've written here.I am crying because when one sister, one brother, one child in Christ is in pain and dealing with suffering- all who are in Christ feel the pain and suffer together. It must be true. I don't even know you and yet, I am sitting here crying.

    We are praying. Praying that God will uphold you with his mighty right hand. Praying that God will give your son a peace that passes all understanding. Praying prayers of thanksgiving that you are faithfully hanging on to the Lord and proclaiming Him as the ruler, the author and finisher of our faith. I don't understand these things. These unfair circumstances that God's people must face. I have so many questions for God.

    My daughter and I are reading in Isaiah. We came across the well-known words, "His ways are not our ways, His ways are higher..." I've had to just accept these words so often, not fully understanding those Higher Ways, but trusting.

    You are right to fight the spiritual battle for your son. I pray for strength for you for the continuing battle. May peace come.

    May healing come.

    Much love in Christ, Jesus, my sister,

    Heidi@2 Thinks to Share

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  5. May the joy of the Lord be yours today, Melanie,Dan,and Andrew.

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  6. Hi Melanie...I am wondering if your husband has been able to stay with you the whole time or if his work is an issue. I hope you are not alone there at the hospital. I know this is getting so long to be away from home for all of you. Can they try any other anti nausea drugs? There are a lot of them out there. I would think the vomiting isn't helping the headache any! Poor sweetheart. I hate feeling nauseous. You know I am praying, praying, praying. And I know hospitals are noisy...it amazes me that they THINK anyone could sleep. I went home 2 days earlier than I probably should have cause I couldn't sleep. Oh, life is so difficult at times isn't it? But we KNOW that God is with you and Andrew.

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  7. Melanie,

    Melanie:

    When I first found your blog, I hoped to encourage you as I prayed for your precious Andrew. Yet, each time you post, I find it is YOU who is encouraging me! The Lord is teaching me so much about faith and prayer through your words...thank you for being so willing to be a conduit for the Lord even in the midst of Andrew's battle!

    I continue to lift up Andrew in prayer; God IS working on Andrew's behalf!

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  8. Melanie,

    There is never any words that I can to think to say that will make things any easier for any of you. I really wish there was something I could do. I can and do pray EVERY SINGLE time the Lord brings Andrew to my mind which is quite frequently. I think that even though he is going through such a horrible battle right now, that he is such a fortunate little boy in that he has you for his mother and a God who will never forsake him. We don't know all God has in mind to accomplish through this battle, but we know it will be more than we could probably even imagine. I will continue to pray for you all. May God touch you all today in a mighty way. Blessings to you, Debbie

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  9. Melanie, I have written down all of your prayer requests so I don't forget any of them!

    Gracious Father, I pray for a manifestation of Your Holy Spirit to descend upon Andrew so that his faith will prevail while evil fills his days and nights. Help Andrew choose to rejoice in You always, for we know You will hold us high in our faith, even in the midst of enemy invasion. I pray for deliverance and a sustaining power for the entire family, so they may all emerge victorious during this battle. Amen!

    God bless you all.

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  10. Oh the tears flow as I take a break at work to read your post. I just prayed for you & your family & your Andrew this morning on my way home from my night job. At a church I used to attend I'll never forget when the pastor co-preached w/ his wife and she walked up on the platform in army fatigues. I don't have my Bible with me so I can't tell you what passage they preached from, but the message was "Not on my Watch". Reminds me of you Mel...not on my watch.
    I will continue to praise & pray. Thank you for sharing this journey/battle with us. You have many warriors in your corner.
    Love,
    Lelia
    I'll send you the scripture that went w/ their message.

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  11. Lord, we lift up our hands to you. Like Melanie, we choose to battle against this intruder in Andrew's life. It must flee. Strengthen your warriors so we can trample the enemy and keep marching in the land of the living. To God be the Glory.

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  12. I pray in agreement with you for the specific requests you laid out for Andrew and for you and your husband. My love and prayers remain...

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  13. Your post reminds me of the song "He's my son" by Mark Schultz. I don't know if you are familiar with it, but I will include the lyrics here, as I am sure you can relate. Praying for you all. Love you, Mel!

    I'm down on my knees again tonight
    I'm hoping this prayer will turn out right
    See there is a boy that needs Your help
    I've done all that I can do myself
    His mother is tired
    I'm sure You can understand
    Each night as he sleeps
    She goes in to hold his hand
    And she tries not to cry
    As the tears fill her eyes

    CHORUS:
    Can You hear me?
    Am I getting through tonight?
    Can You see him?
    Can You make him feel all right?
    If You can hear me
    Let me take his place somehow
    See, he's not just anyone
    He's my son

    Sometimes late at night I watch him sleep
    I dream of the boy he'd like to be
    I try to be strong and see him through
    But God who he needs right now is You
    Let him grow old
    Live life without this fear
    What would I be
    Living without him here
    He's so tired and he's scared
    Let him know that You're there

    CHORUS

    Can You hear me?
    Can You see him?
    Please don't leave him
    He's my son

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  14. I'm blinking away tears as I write this.

    You are so encouraging to me. My faith is stirred even more when I read your posts.

    My heart is breaking for Andrew, you and your family, and so I continue to bombard heaven with prayers for you all.

    Thank you for the updates ~ so we know exactly what to pray for. I know it must be hard to find the time and energy to it.

    Hugs...

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  15. Thanks for posting the updates. I will be praying for Andrew and your family.

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  16. Dear Mel,
    Your faith, trust and love in the Lord and Almighty Father is beautiful...
    I know they can hear your prayers for Andrew's full recovery and I pray to God to help your Beloved Son.
    You are an inspiration to Mother's all over the world...who may also need to cope and gain faith, trust and hope in God.
    You are an amazing, loving, caring Mother...and God will not forsake you, nor your husband Dan and family.
    You all remain in my thoughts and prayers daily.

    Sincerely,
    K. Frangeskos at
    Jesus Knows You Best

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  17. Praying for relief and perseverence for Andrew, and for strength and peace for you all. The Lord is being glorified through this and through your actions and thoughts during this time. It gives so much hope to others who may have to endure something similar. Keep on pressing on!

    Hugs,
    Linda

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  18. Melanie, I am lost for words anymore. Your letter was beautiful and heartfelt and full of a mother's anguished cries. I weep with you and stand firm on our belief that God will heal Andrew and that the evil cancer will disappear. Continued prayers for Andrew. Will be going to church tonight and I will shout his name to the Lord.

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  19. *and the Lord is the one who goes ahead of you; He will be with you. He will not fail you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.* Duet. 31:8

    my lips move in prayers for you sweet friend. here's to the lifter of your boys' chin! ☺

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  20. I will be praying over the specific requests you named sis, I love you. This was a beautiful, heart touching post.

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  21. I hope Andrew is feeling better today and that the headaches are not as bad, and the nausea is gone.
    Stay strong.

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  22. Psalm 85:12 (New International Version)

    12 The LORD will indeed give what is good,
    and our land will yield its harvest.

    Great words to your son......remember them for yourself as well. God is in control and will only allow that which He can carry you through. He is with you, and He will help you and He will strenghten you with HIs Righteous right hand!

    Suzanne

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  23. Somehow I found your blog winding through other blogs looking for crafty ideas for the home. I no longer care about that...I want to pray for Andrew.

    Dear God in Heaven, You see and know all that is going on with Andrew. You care. You hurt as this mother, child and family hurts and I ask you to be with them today...comfort them, love them and guide them. I take dominion and authority over this cancer and I command it to go! IN Jesus Name....Go! You have no right to invade the body of this child...you are not welcome...you are an intruder and you have to go....IN JESUS NAME! I release complete HEALING into this child....I release healing in the wonderful, matchless, lovely Name of Jesus...for Your glory, God. I speak healing for Andrew....I accept healing for Andrew and I praise and thank you for Andrew's healing....in Jesus Name, Amen.

    Thank you, Jesus...thank you, Lord.
    You're wonderful...You're the healer...Your Word says You forgive all our sins..and heal all our diseases...and we thank You, Lord...we thank You!

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  24. Storming the heavens with you, Melanie... I stand alongside of you believing God will heal your son! May He strengthen you and your husband as you cry out on Andrew's behalf.

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  25. My mother heart breaks with you for all the agony Andrew is experiencing. But it also prays with you to our mighty God! Lord, please, release Andrew from the demons of nausea, vomiting, pain, discomfort, & all else that pulls him away from You. Fill Him with Your peace, Your comfort, Your strength, Your power over all these things. Give rest to Andrew & his family, & fill them with the peace that only You can give. Thank you for the strong faith they all have, given by You, the giver of every good & perfect gift!

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  26. Melanie, your letter brought tears to my eyes. It brought back memories of when my twins were born and they were premature. One of them had to go back in the hospital because he had something called intussuception. I cried and cried and wished it had been me not him. He was healed and is just fine now. He is 9 yrs old. We as mothers will do anything for our babies. We all stand with you in front of this battle and rebuke the cancer in Andrew. Imagine all of us holding each others hands standing in a line and praying. Praying for Andrew. Continuing prayers here. ((HUGS))
    Sandra

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  27. Peace be to you and your family Melanie..my heart goes out to you...Andrew is in my prayers..take care..

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  28. Praying for these specific requests and for the sweet Holy Spirit to be felt by all....

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  29. My heart goes out to you Melanie. You are so strong and such an inspiration to all of us. I am continually praying for you and Andrew and your precious family.

    Eyes to the skies!

    Hugs from Texas.

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  30. Melanie~

    I think of and pray for you and Andrew daily. Standing in faith and agreeing with you on all accounts.

    Love and prayers,
    Sandy

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  31. Andrew is so blessed to have such a wonderful spiritual warrior and child of God as his mother . I started reading your blog by "Life and Style by God's design".Keep fighting . I am in NC if you need anything,.I will be praying tonight as I have been since 9/11 for the specific things needed for a full miracle. May God surround you with a comfort and peace that no other can provide. Blessings,Melissa

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  32. You, Andrew, your family are daily on my mind. Lord, give Melanie and her husband enough strength each day to sustain them. Encourage Melanie, tell her she is doing a wonderful job. Oh holy Lord, please relieve Andrew, oh Lord, please. Obliterate this cancer now. Show your power to all by erasing this cancer today. We will praise you Lord, we will praise You...in Jesus name, Amen.
    Hugs and love,
    Lisa

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  33. Praying out loud for Andrew and you all throughout your letter, dear Melanie ~ Praying for that cancer to GO, in the mighty name of Jesus, name above all names ~ Praying they will find you a private room ~ Love and Hugs,
    Cathy

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  34. "The Things of earth grow strangely dim in the light of His glory and grace." As I read your words, I am reminded of the "things" of this earth that seem important to me each day - they grow dim. He grows brighter!

    Keep shining the light. You and Andrew and your sweet family. Praying for you all Melanie. God is using you greatly. God Bless. Love and prayers.

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  35. I continue to pray for Andrew and for you and your family. And I am agreeing with you in each word of your prayer - and believing for complete healing and restoration for Andrew. To the glory of the Lord! ~Adrienne~

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  36. Melanie,
    I will pray for the things on your list...you and your sweet Andrew are in my thoughts and prayers daily...I pray that he gets relief in all the ways you mentioned. I have a son the same age...and I can't imagine how hard this is on you...Hugs!!
    Praying in Indiana.......
    Jerelene

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  37. We are praying, praying, praying, believing that God is setting up cancer-free zones for His glory! We shall be eyewitnesses of His Majesty. I hurt for you and your family for this very hard place you are going through. There are many with you. Love and strength and blessing to you.

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  38. Thinking of you Melanie. Praying your baby has a good day and healing will spread throughout his body. Love you. B

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  39. I have no words to share, other than constant prayer for you all. Love to all ~ TTFN ~ Marydon

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  40. How beautiful!
    I stumbled on your blog through a friend's. My heart breaks for you. I don't have children but I teach them. You are such an encouragement to others. I was recently in bed for two weeks with severe fatigue(couldn't even fix meals and all alone) and my great aunt called and said, "When you don't think you can make it and giving up thoughts come over you, quote Scriptures. I quoted "When I am weak, He is strong" and "I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me." I said them at least a hundred times. I can't believe how much I felt God working and after having to wait-have now seen Him work to bring about healing. (I had problems with my thyroid and hormones- endocrine system) Keep praying those Scriptures! They are a light to our path! His Word is our sword! I will be praying them for Andrew too! And for you and your husband!
    He sent forth His Word and healed them. Psalm 107:20

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  41. Carrying you in my thoughts and prayers.

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  42. dear melanie...last night my husband found me teary after reading your letter to andrew. he knew about you as we have all been praying for andrew and of course your family. i was told him last night that i am just wondering WHY WHY WHY!!!
    i told him that here was this nice lady, who just wants to spread God's word and LOVE...that she is faithful and seems kind. i told him that from your blog, it seems the only other thing you want to do is be in your cozy house with your husband, raise your 3 good kids, play with your dog, find good recipes and try not to eat sugar except on special occasions. doesn't sound like too much to ask! why then this agony which is every mom's worst nightmare.
    anyway, this morning (we are americans living in asia..12 hours ahead) i just had my quiet time and read about how each experience of joy, sorrow, difficulty or success, hardship or danger etc...makes its own particular demand on God. Each one serving to answer the prayer of "make me love Thee more and more."
    still i am wondering why. keep letting it out into that pillow dear melanie because that is just all about YOUR survival. of course prayers continue from this side of the world.
    love robin

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  43. Melanie, I just cried and cried reading this. What a treasure you are to go before the throne for your sweet boy on his behalf. My heart is grieved for you and your family. I know you're exhausted. I'm praying for Andrew to come home SOON! I want you to know you are a testimony to all of us. Your family, your friends, your fellow bloggers, we are all impacted by this story and I personally am inspired by your faith.

    Dear Heavenly Father, I ask you in Jesus' name, to touch every single sick cell in Andrew's body and HEAL it. Let Melanie and her husband feel the relief that comes when You carry them on eagle's wings. Lord, please give them supernatural strength. In Jesus name, Amen.

    Sending love to you and your family Mel. Love, Angela

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  44. Our family too has been rocked by the devistation of a child with a brain tumor. I stubled upon your blog, while looking for decorating ideas and I have since spent the last hour or so reading about your Angle Andrew. My nephew Mickey Reeves was diagnosed with a Brain Tumor in January of this year when he was ten years old. Although, it is not the same tumor as Andrews, reading your blog was reliving the first few months all over again. My prayers are with your family and your friends. The illness of a child effects not only those you can see, it effects people by the masses. My heart aches for you and yours.

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  45. Our family too has been rocked by the devistation of a child with a brain tumor. I stubled upon your blog, while looking for decorating ideas and I have since spent the last hour or so reading about your Angle Andrew. My nephew Mickey Reeves was diagnosed with a Brain Tumor in January of this year when he was ten years old. Although, it is not the same tumor as Andrews, reading your blog was reliving the first few months all over again. My prayers are with your family and your friends. The illness of a child effects not only those you can see, it effects people by the masses. My heart aches for you and yours.

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  46. We are still praying and believing. Your letter touches every heart that reads it...and we choose to believe it will touch his heart when he is healed and reads it for himself. He already knows that your are praying for him and standing guard over him but when he is healed he will be able to look back on this journal of your journey....the recording of the battle of good and evil....keep standing and we will keep praying. We are spiritually trying to lift up your arms as the battle rages to ensure victory in times when you get weary. Let him know that so many are praying with you...let him know there are many believing for relief from his pain and discomfort....let him know he is loved even though he is not known by us.........he already knows he is loved by the ONE who knows him best, just keep reminding him.

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  47. Dear Melanie, I am continuing to pray for Andrew daily and for you too and the rest of your family...praying for total healing for your sweet boy.....

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  48. Melanie,

    Thinking of you and just wanted to drop by and let you know you're being prayed for in Arkansas.

    We love you,
    friends you've just never met yet.

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  49. Praying, Asking, Believing. Hope you guys get some time at home soon. B

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  50. I wrote a message to you the other day and then it said I wasn't connected to the internet.
    I'm not going to re-write it all.....in case it happens to show up later :) but please know that I am praying and have you all in my thoughts often.
    Give Andrew a little kiss on the cheek for me, ok?
    Tell him someone in Oklahoma loves him and is praying for him.
    Take care and tell your family I'm praying for them as well.
    Love,
    Valerie

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  51. Beautiful Melanie, your son is so blessed to have you as his mom. May the Faithful One continue to be your Rock and your strength and your Tower of Refuge in the midst of all of this. I know that you are clinging to Him. I joined you at the Throne this morning to lift all of those requests to the Father. Please, tell Andrew that there are 2 beautiful girls in Texas praying for him too...my Rachel and Hannah (she is 12). Please, keep posting and leting us know how we can pray for all of you.

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  52. Even before this heartfelt mother's prayer was offered from your lips - it was heard, received, and answered by the Father above. [Ps 139:4 / Daniel 9:20-23]

    WE are praying Melanie... WE will be your Aaron and Hur under the arms of Moses when he could no longer hold them up by himself. This IS a spiritual battle and everything you prayed over Andrew was right on target against the enemy.

    Fighting Words:

    FAITH
    TRUST
    PERSEVERANCE
    RESTORATION
    HEALING
    PRAISE TO GOD'S GLORY!

    Choosing JOY, Stephanie
    [JESUS - the One I sing to]

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  53. Oh Melanie you are an inspiration. You are holding on and fighting the good fight. We are fighting with you precious one. Praying all these things with you.

    Much love!!!

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  54. My prayers are still with your family and your precious little Andrew.

    Blessings....

    Beverly

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  55. Melanie,
    May God bless your son and your family. Prayer is very powerful and you certainly have ours. Sending thoughts and hugs your way...
    Christina

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  56. You've been in my thoughts and prayers...

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  57. I am praying for each and every one of these needs. Life is so difficult for all of you during these long days of waiting and praying. But God is mighty and the source of all comfort and good. Much love to you, your family, and sweet Andrew.
    xo...Kathy

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  58. came via Mary's blog which says," Pray for Andrew"

    I have a son named Andrew too. As a mum, I understand what it is like to see your child very sick. I walked that path. I think of you and pray.

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  59. Asking God to surround your family with much love. Believing for our season of miracles. I love you.

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