Love Him Like No One Else

(Bella~Mella & One Fine Man)

Love Him Like No One Else

In January I shared a very intimate word that the Lord had given me to prepare my heart for what I knew not then. However, soon the reason for the preparation became quite obvious. The word the Lord spoke to my heart regarded loving my husband. HIS specific words were these, “Love him like no one else.”
(Go here to read the back story.)

Today I love my husband more than I ever have. I love him more now than the day I walked the aisle of a church in Georgia to stand at his side.

I love my husband more now than I did in the hours in which he was my labor coach (hee, hee, hoo, hoo). At the birth of our third child, I will never forget my husband’s compassionate gaze and his words, “You are my hero.” (‘So glad he did not say, “You are my hee, hee, hero!)

I love my husband more now than I did in the spring of our love. Besides even in the season of spring, storm clouds swirl and hard rains fall.

One summer our love suffered a season of drought. We sought shelter from the scorching heat and once again the Creator crafted something beautiful from dust. Our hearts could love again.

I love him more now than I did last year or even at the beginning of this year. Love grows when the weeds are pulled. Love grows when you water it daily. And love grows when its face is toward the SON.

Because I am loving him like no one else, Love has grown.

Update: One Fine Man is no longer using his crutches. He is limping but walking! The skin graft is almost completely closed up. He is back to work 100%. He has been riding a bike for exercise. He remains the ONE FINE MAN who has my back and holds my hand.

When Love Bites

When Love Bites

The first week that One Fine Man and I were home from the hospital after his skiing accident in CO, our little Pekingese pup, Teddy, would not leave my husband’s side. Ted knew something was not as it should be with his master and he appointed himself as bodyguard.

Ted lay next to my husband’s injured leg, getting up only if One Fine Man got up. At first, Ted cocked his head at the crutches but after a thorough sniffing, he accepted their presence. He watched with quizzical interest as I changed the dressing on his master’s wound. Ted relinquished his happy-go-lucky “let’s go for another walk” mindset because it seemed now he had a real job. He lost interest in walks, toys, and everyone else UNLESS they got too close to One Fine Man’s left leg. For hours at a time, Ted lay next to OFM.

Every visitor was treated with suspicion. When our pastor and his wife came by the first evening we were home, Ted was on guard. He sat on the floor between our guests and his master. When our pastor moved forward to pray for One Fine Man, Ted was on alert, jumping to all fours and barking. Ted was “no respecter of [visitors]” and this behavior was repeated with each friend who dropped by.

Although Ted is not usually allowed on our bed, I made an exception and let him stay at One Fine Man’s side. One evening, it was getting late and I walked to the bedroom to get Ted for his nightly trip to the mailbox. There he lay at One Fine Man’s leg. As I went to scoop him off the bed, he bit me! Never had Ted bitten me before. I was shocked. And bleeding! As I rinsed my finger under the faucet, I felt my anger and confusion growing toward Ted. Why would he feel the need to protect One Fine Man from ME? Miffed, I banished Ted from the bed forever. No exceptions!

A couple of days later Ted “wrote” an apology to me. It was on a post-it note attached to the top of his paw. His ghost writer, Guitar Girl, delivered Ted to me, giggling over what a genius he was to have taken paw to paper. I didn’t at first accept Ted’s apology. Oh, I continued to feed him chicken and hamburger and put down fresh water. I washed his bowls, gave him a bath and took him for walks to the mailbox and beyond. But my heart was not in it because I was hurt.

Soon, however, Ted’s puppy dog eyes and wagging tail proved irresistible and I was back to loving Ted.

Since that incident I have considered how often I react like Ted and my “love bites.” Sometimes I protect my heart from the very ones I love the most. I would die for them. But some days it seems like too much work to be kind when I am dog-tired. Some days my love is snappish and short and I wonder do they feel the bared teeth in my service to them? I wash, cook, drive, assist, clean, listen, take up the slack…In my service to those I love, where is my heart? Does my love bite? So I take pen to paper and offer an apology. “I’m sorry I bit you. Please forgive me. I love you.”

Part Two - From the Top of the Mountain

(To read part one, scroll down.)

Continued - Yet, with all of my thoughts of planning and preparation for the New Year, it was God who had done the planning. He had prepared my heart weeks before.
A day after the accident, I was standing in the hospital room and a memory flooded my mind. I was back in my bedroom, a few weeks before our trip, putting away clothes and God spoke to my heart. I remember the deep emotion that came with such a personal and humbling word that God spoke to me.

In room 205 at St. Anthony Summit Medical Center, after the first surgery of four, I stood looking at my husband lying in the hospital bed. The memory of the words from God pierced my thoughts. Silently I responded to God, “So this is why You spoke those words to me a few weeks ago. This is it.”

In an instant, I understood why God had spoken that particular message to me. At the time, I thought I would simply try to do better than I had lately. Yes, I would add it to the growing list of my New Year’s resolutions.

Now, blinking back tears and swallowing hard, I promised God, “I will do it. I will do what you told me only I can do.” What He spoke to me as I was in my bedroom weeks earlier is so personal that I hesitate to share it.

I remember exactly where I was standing when God directed my thoughts toward the losses my husband has endured.

When he was sixteen, his father died after suffering from leukemia, believed to be a result of Agent Orange while serving in Vietnam.

A few years ago, his oldest sister passed away from the cancer that had ravaged her body for months. My husband and his oldest sister had a bond that comes from sharing the same faith in God. Although my husband has three more siblings, unfortunately they don’t see one another often.

In the spring of 2008, his mother passed away. She, too, had been in and out of the hospital several times before she passed from this life.

Although my parents have their health challenges, especially my precious mother, they are still on this earth and I can call them anytime for a quick chat or a long conversation. I never doubt their love and they tell me frequently they are proud of me. It was my parents who drove hours to our home to stay with our children when I returned to the hospital in CO.

When God pointed out the losses my husband has dealt with, He also pointed something else out.

He started with a question. "If you don’t love him with everything you have, who will? No one else on this earth can love him like you can. LOVE HIM LIKE NO ONE ELSE."

And that was it. But with that, I thought about the times my actions were right but my heart was not. I thought about instances where I did not honor my husband like I should have. I thought about times I had turned away from him instead of to him.

Of course I know there is no perfect marriage because there are no perfect people. And even healthy relationships have their peaks and valleys. Ours certainly has. But there was not just a do~ing better that was needed here. Yet not the extreme requirement of a heart transplant. Just something of a heart make-over. Soften the lines, smooth out the creases, bring the color back, plump it up...A heart~lift.

Someone asked me recently why I think this happened. This is my response to that question. “Accidents happen. I don’t believe God caused it and I don’t believe it was an attack of the enemy. Accidents happen because we live in this world. But God knew it was going to take place. And in His kindness, He prepared me in advance to care for my husband through the healing process. Through the good times in life and through the bad, we have the opportunity to grow and to learn. If we are teachable, we will learn. God will redeem the right and the best from anything we experience. Will the enemy try to take advantage of the situation? He will most certainly use every trick he can. But we are always the victors through Christ.”

These past few days One Fine Man has been in a lot of pain. The pain at the wound site wakes him up. Last night he suffered terribly and we watched the clock for when he could take another pain pill. I moved closer to him, warming him and resting my hand on his chest. I began to pray for God to intervene. I hated to see him suffer and hated my helplessness. I asked if there was any thing I could do for him. He said, “Just stay beside me.” In the dark, tears sprang to my eyes and I shifted closer. I thought again about God’s words to me. LOVE HIM LIKE NO ONE ELSE.

I do. I will.

Sometimes God prepares our hearts in ways we cannot fathom for events we would not choose. What is God preparing your heart for?